And through it all, we'll find some other way

Hello starshines

the earth says hello

And through it all, we'll find some other way
To carry on through cartilage and fluid
And did you come to stare, or wash away the blood?
--
Desert Song {My Chemical Romance}

Ive made mistakes in all sorts of shapes and sizes. Ive let people get the best of me and break me like a twig, but I'm still here aren't I? Ive been through Hell and back....ive been through it all. Death. Depression. Insanity. You name it. But through it all Ive discovered theres always a light at the end of the tunnel, that theres someone waiting for me at the end of the dark...reaching out their hand to take me with them to somewhere bright and new. I can't erase what Ive done or undo the pain Ive inflicted, all i can do is move on and make amends. Its for the best. Im not going to repeat my past, or let them break me. I know there are people out there that would love to see me fall..but im not going to let them. Im going to stand up strong. I may dress and look weird, but thats me. I like dressing in black, my morbid curiousity, my poems, my songs, my random outbursts, my smile, my tears, my mood swings, shouting random words, being hyper, listening to crazy music that adults may never understand, loving people i want to love, hanging out with insane kids that I call my posse, its who I am and they can never change that. I wont be accepted by everyone I know, but the true people the matter will accept me, and the rest I'll leave behind in the tunnel. So many people have encouraged me to do my best. I know it was aggravating when I didnt listen. I didnt want to listen I had given up on everything, but Im back and Im ready for fate. I know I can do amazing things when i put my mind to it... Im a smart beautiful girl. & I have the power to impact people, and just maybe the world.

"A long time ago, in the underground realm, where there are no lies or pain, there lived a Princess who dreamed of the human world. She dreamed of blue skies, soft breeze, and sunshine. One day, eluding her keepers, the Princess escaped. Once outside, the brightness blinded her and erased every trace of the past from her memory. She forgot who she was and where she came from. Her body suffered cold, sickness, and pain. Eventually, she died. However, her father, the King, always knew that the Princess' soul would return, perhaps in another body, in another place, at another time. And he would wait for her, until he drew his last breath, until the world stopped turning..."

I am older than my age and my real name is not important. I've had so many names... Old names that only the wind and the trees can pronounce. I am interested in many things like illustration, creative writing, music, literature, graphic/web design, cake, shopping, cute things, and wonder... I also listen to music that I find facinating D'espairsRay, Dir En Grey, Gackt, Maximum The Hormone, Gazette, Tokio Hotel, Utada Hikaru, Malice Mizer, Coldplay, Evanescence, LM.C, P!ATD, Seether, Buck-Tick, Marilyn Manson, and My chemical romance, but i mostly listen to classical music..it always soothes me.


Im going to die aren't I?
Not unless wedding shedules, screaming girls, flowers, dresses, and that kind of stuff can kill you. And if it can Im taking it all away and we'll go elope.

I dont know who I truely am, not yet, i think the real me is deep inside. somewhere. waiting. so who am i? i am a friend, a enemy, a sister, a cousin, a daughter, a sympathetic ear, a niece, a granddaughter, a student, a teacher... I am a stranger... Im am not very simple, on the on the contrary I am very complicated. Ill give you explainations if you just ask. I am loved by many, and i choose to love back. Even to those who are undeserving. My true friends are amazing, theyve always been there for me. I wouldnt replace them for anyhting.


"One person's crazyness is another person's reality."~Tim Burton

I write poetry and the occasional song.. My beliefs and opinions wont be changed by silly arguements.my favorite movies are horror. my hair is highlighted and i have ear piercings. for now. i am a dreamer and i believe in true love and i am hopeless romantic. i might offend you or i could also defend you, dont get upset either way. I can be hypocritical but not often. i am very outgoing and very open. I answer most questions so dont be shy to ask. I make mistakes but dont call me on them. My life is a rollercoaster and i have been through many things, and i love to help people. Please, before you hurt yourself talk to me. i love getting to know new people and making new friends.

"And it is said that the Princess returned to her father's kingdom. That she reigned there with justice and a kind heart for many centuries. That she was loved by her people. And that she left behind small traces of her time on Earth, visible only to those who know where to look" ~Pan

goodnight my beautiful,

I'll be watching you.♥

No Stranger Than Most

'And so the lion fell in love with the lamb

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About Me

:: M A E R D ::
Within the distorted sound of the heart-pounding breeze all ideals collapsed, future broken, I am still... I want to be with you more, I can feel it, I want to be by your side more but I can't hide the tears of weakness behind my smiles any further. Its amber-coloured at the end of my dreams of many years, and Im wondering if my true self be there. Im ready endure it to the death... I stretched out my hand... but when I arrived now... we're in hell under control of him. I inform you of the end, the light is vanishing and the stage is dark, I wanted to hear your voice more, I want to be here more but the goodbye from my heart from your beloved name. I can feel summer breeze on my back, my flowing tears and blood mix, amber-coloured.
Name Bella Van Hawthorne
Gender Female
Age 17
Location Oklahoma City, OK
Ethnicity Other
Interested in Both
Status Single
Interests illustration, creative writing, music, literature, graphicweb design, cake, shopping, cute things, wonder
Music d'espairsray, dir en grey, gackt, maximum the hormone, gazette, tokio hotel, utada hikaru, malice mizer, coldplay, evanescence, lmc, patd, seether, bucktick, marilyn manson, mcr

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Registered Feb 4, 2008
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